Stars
You’d think decades are long enough to forget or heal, but time is ruthless, both in a second and in eternity.
There’s been a lot of pain but I have finally understood that there’ll never be more hurt than love.
Time hardly moved then, but flows rapidly now, the last grains of sand in the hourglass rushing to catch their own tail.
Past and present reunited in our hearts, your laughter still lingering in my ear like a harmony between the two.
Now I see, there are no more stars, but cracks in Heaven, letting your love shine on me.
———————————————————-Dedicated to my Father, Ioan Galasiu, who went to Heaven 32 years ago ❤️❤️❤️
100 words, Memyselfandela- Adela Clancy-Galasiu, 22 December 2021
Lunatic
The absolute solitude embraces the caryatids but has not forgotten the smile in your eyes.
I spend my days with my rebel freedom, with the stone kings and the frozen time.
Life continues to pulsate in the depths of my heartless veins.
On the same stairs where you were holding my hand
The rain has replaced the sound of your footsteps beside me.
Your wish for happiness has not yet extinguished my soul.
I write like a lunatic on the corner of every table I happen to find,
In the silent places where I have once been with you.
Lunatic. Yes, I am a lunatic. The absolute lunatic for loving you.
111 words, memyselfandela, February 2014
Photo: Photobucket
The Sound of Missing You
The sun paints a last trace of life before dying in agony. With it’s last drops of shadow it lingers under my tired eyes.
I carry within the memory of what love used to be. I can still hear our fading steps on the same old roads, on the same grey pavement. I can still feel your arm tight around my waist and your laughter.
Near me other couples chat like we used to, holding hands, blessed to not know how futile and doomed this moment of happiness is, sentenced to only live for a glimpse in time.
*
I was a fool to believe that you can make a choice. No. I chose you. The one you really are, not the one that hides his face. The one in which I believe, not the one that never believes in himself.
Darkness rises all around. In thoughts, in the shivering cold, in the unspoken emptiness. My once loving heart bleeds at the thought that you’re gone, yet nobody can take me the smile that you used to have in your eyes.
Maybe in your dimension you dance now with other masked faces and other smiles give you a passing smile. Yet deep inside you will never find your path on your own, there’s no path without love.
**
Rain strikes my cheek like your fingers once used to, falling cold, quenching the marks left by your ardent kisses. My lips whisper the shadows of the same name that never ceased to linger in my mind since I last saw you.
Countless prayers go your way, but you don’t even know it. If I would have stepped off the edge of my life I would still have never found you, for you are far, much further than my thought can reach to kiss you good night.
Memories of a madman fill up the sky as I lay myself to sleep. But even in my dream there will only be this burning love that has never ended.
***
333 words, memyselfandela, January 2014
The One I Love The Most
Love, I never knew how to tell you
How much you’ve hurt me sometimes
I’ve always been there, open and true
Refusing to see the most obvious lies.
Hollow and upset, I’ve always done my best
To imagine a life for us, smile and be kind
But in the end it all felt like a test
And understanding you slipped out of my mind.
You’ll always be the one hunting for goals
I’ll still try to understand when you got lost
No mountain can fill the gap between our souls
Though you’ll always remain the one I love the most
——————————————————————-
100 words
memyselfandela, 2012
without you
no more space under my eyelids to hold on of you
I’ve lost you, you belong to the wind
you were mine when you didn’t even know it
when no one saw us
when we were lost in time
empty and marooned I am left
with the trace of you through me
torn heart that does not know anymore
how to keep on beating
without you
somewhere behind the end of the road
when the nothingness will recompose
we will rise again, you and me
the last pieces missing to make
the eternity real
The Rain
I have passed…
…one day in front of the attic
of our lost moments, where not
even the time wants to stop and remember
that we have once been there, that we have
made love, that the sentimental rain
in our eyes was screaming
on the roof red of emotions, screaming
loud “I love you!”…
… and now I look at the sky and see
no cloud that could
bring us back such a rain…
… and even if the skyline could bring me
again the clouds of my soulful birth
I don’t know where you may still be now…
… my Love…
Broken Tanka
keep waiting for you
I have just seen your shadow
in my memory
smoke covers the face of the
last pieces of broken dreams
————————–
memyselfandela, 2012
Bon Jovi – (You want to ) Make a memory
Music video by Bon Jovi performing (You Want To) Make A Memory.
(C) 2007 UMG Recordings, Inc.
when I think of you ~ quand je pense a toi
when I think of you
my soul breaks
into thousand pieces
that fall at your feet…
don’t cry, you said,
but my heart turns into tears
hoping it can get carried by the storm
and fall on your cheeks to caress them…
my breath leaves my chest
looking for the wind
wanting to be pulled all around you
and hold you in my place…
when I think of you
I melt completely
in this blessed
suffering of ours…
quand je pense à toi
mon âme casse
en mille morceaux
qui tombent à tes pieds …
ne pleure pas, tu as dit,
mais mon cœur se transforme en larmes
en espérant qu’il peut se faire porté par la tempête
et tomber sur tes joues pour les caresser …
mon souffle laisse ma poitrine
recherchent pour le vent
en veulent être tiré tout autour de toi
pour te serrer à ma place …
quand je pense à toi
je fondre complètement
dans ce bienheureux
souffrance des nôtres …
When I say I miss you
“When I say I miss you
I mean I miss riding
Beside you in your car,
My arm around your neck,
Playing with your hair
And being quiet so I can listen
To you singing in french.
When I say I miss you,
I mean i miss sitting
Anywhere close to you,
My arm around your waist,
Playing with your skin
Under my fingers
And whispering
How you make me feel.
When I say I miss you
I mean I wish
You were here so
I wouldn’t have to miss you
Another second and
I could hold you forever. ”
by Nick Downer
“Quand je dit tu me manque,
Je veux dire je manque etre a cote de toi,
Dans ta voiture,
Mon bra autour ton cou
Jouer avec tes cheveaux
Et etre silencieuse pour pouvoir t’ecouter
Chantes en francais.
Quand je dit tu me manque,
Je veux dire je manque m’asseoir,
Aupres de toi,
Mon bras autour de tes hanches,
Jouer avec ton peau
Sous mes doigts
Et murmurant
Comment tu me fais sentir.
Quand Je dit tu me manque,
Je veux dire j’aimerais
Que tu sois ici
Alors, je ne te manqerai pas
Un autre second et
Je pourrais te tenir pour toujours.”
To Blossom Blue – Lake Of Tears
“I’m bleeding, I’m bleeding in ways of the fire burned.
I’m crying, I’m crying in ways of the nightbird.
No more is there one to lay by my side.
I’m straying, I’m straying in nightmares all the time.
A little something I know,
A little somewhere I go,
Reminds me of you.
To blossom blue is to blossom without you.
To blossom blue…
I’m breaking, I’m breaking but I cannot bear to.
I’m staring, I’m staring but I cannot see you.
For no more are you to lay by my side…
I’m weeping, I’m weeping no more then this second time.
A little something I know,
A little somewhere I go,
Where the sweet waters flow,
Reminds me of you…
A little something I know,
A little somewhere I go,
Where the sweet waters flow,
Where the mistletoes grow,
Reminds me of you.
To blossom blue is to blossom without you.
To blossom blue is to blossom without you.”
Dokken – There Was A Time
“It was late like the storm
Finding it hard tried to carry on
Without fear or the shame
We could walk in park
without being afraid
Was a time I believed
As the story unfolded so free
Now the passion is gone
All wrong
Down to the lake moonlit dawn
There was a time I believed
Time would heal everything
Was a time I believed
You were everything I need
They say that it’s starting to show
Should have seen it long ago
There was a time I believed
You were everything I need
As a child
We believed
We could wake from the night
and the dawn it seemed
Was so warm
So warm
Into his arms like a child I was born
Was a time I believed
Time would heal everything
Was a time I believed
You were everything I need
You took me like the sage
Searching for some absolution
Hard to know the reason nobody cared
Once upon a time
Take me right away
Let me know there’s still a season
Let me know there’s still
a reason to live
Give me peace of mind
There was a time I believed
Time would heal everything
Was a time I believed
You were everything I need
They say that it’s starting to show
Should have seen it long ago
There was a time I believed
You were everything I need
So now I’m taking a chase of Cavasier
With all of those words that
we shouldn’t have said
Walking the beach for
the last time again
Missing you more than I should…”
D. Dokken/K. Keeling
Clenched Soul, Pablo Neruda
“We have lost even this twilight.
No one saw us this evening hand in hand
while the blue night dropped on the world.
I have seen from my window
the fiesta of sunset in the distant mountain tops.
Sometimes a piece of sun
burned like a coin in my hand.
I remembered you with my soul clenched
in that sadness of mine that you know.
Where were you then?
Who else was there?
Saying what?
Why will the whole of love come on me suddenly
when I am sad and feel you are far away?
The book fell that always closed at twilight
and my blue sweater rolled like a hurt dog at my feet.
Always, always you recede through the evenings
toward the twilight erasing statues. “
lingering tanka
I only take time
once a day to think of you
it might not seem much
but it’s twenty four hours
that this moment is lasting.
Stay
Stay with me always
in this pure sweet harmony…
Run away sometimes
but always come back to me…
What would I be without thee?
Viens lentement t’asseoir , Emile Verhaeren
Viens lentement t’asseoir
Près du parterre dont le soir
Ferme les fleurs de tranquille lumière,
Laisse filtrer la grande nuit en toi:
Nous sommes trop heureux pour que sa mer d’effroi
Trouble notre prière.
Là-haut, le pur cristal des étoiles s’éclaire:
Voici le firmament plus net et translucide
Qu’un étang bleu ou qu’un vitrail d’abside;
Et puis voici le ciel qui regarde à travers.
Les mille voix de l’énorme mystère
Parlent autour de toi,
Les mille lois de la nature entière
Bougent autour de toi,
Les arcs d’argent de l’invisible
Prennent ton âme et sa ferveur pour cible.
Mais tu n’as peur, oh ! simple coeur,
Mais tu n’as peur, puisque ta foi
Est que toute la terre collabore
A cet amour que fit éclore
La vie et son mystère en toi.
Joins donc les mains tranquillement
Et doucement adore ;
Un grand conseil de pureté
Flotte, comme une étrange aurore,
Sous les minuits du firmament.
Les heures claires (1896)
Evocation / Évocation – Nichita Stanescu
She was beautiful like the shadow of an idea
Her back smell like baby skin
Like freshly broken stone
Like scream from a dead language
She had no weight like respiration
Laughing and crying with big tears
She was salted like the salt
Offered at big feasts by barbarians.
She was beautiful like the shadow of an idea
Among waters, she alone was a shore.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elle était belle comme l’ombre d’une idée.
Ses épaules sentaient la peau fraîche d’une enfant;
à une pierre elle semblait – vite brisée,
au cri elle paraissait – dans une langue morte.
Elle n’avait pas de poids comme le halètement.
Souriante – larmoyante aux grandes larmes, rares —
elle était salée comme le sel poudroyant
consacré aux festins par les vieux barbares.
Elle était belle comme l’ombre d’une pensée.
Entre les eaux, elle était à elle seule, la terre affamée.
Chaque heure, ou je songe a ta bonté, Émile Verhaeren
Chaque heure, où je songe à ta bonté
Si simplement profonde,
Je me confonds en prières vers toi.
Je suis venu si tard
Vers la douceur de ton regard,
Et de si loin vers tes deux mains tendues,
Tranquillement, par à travers les étendues !
J’avais en moi tant de rouille tenace
Qui me rongeait, à dents rapaces, la confiance.
J’étais si lourd, j’étais si las,
J’étais si vieux de méfiance,
J’étais si lourd, j’étais si las
Du vain chemin de tous mes pas.
Je méritais si peu la merveilleuse joie
De voir tes pieds illuminer ma voie,
Que j’en reste tremblant encore et presque en pleurs
Et humble, à tout jamais, en face du bonheur.
Les heures claires (1896)
He who dies (Ode to Life), Pablo Neruda
“Slowly dies he who becomes a slave to habit,
repeating the same journey every day,
he who doesn’t change his march, he who doesn’t risk
and change the color of his clothes, he who doesn’t speak to he whom he doesn’t know.
Slowly dies he who makes of the television his guru,
he who avoids a passion dies, he who prefers
black on white and dots on i’s rather than a togetherness of emotions
exactly those that make the eyes shine,
those that make the heart beat
before error and feeling.
Slowly dies he who doesn’t overturn the table,
he who is unhappy in his work,
he who doesn’t risk certainty for uncertainty
to follow a dream,
he who doesn’t permit himself at least one time in his life
to flee sensible counsels.
Slowly dies he who doesn’t travel, he who doesn’t read,
he who doesn’t listen to music,
he who doesn’t find grace in himself.
he who destroys his own love dies,
he who doesn’t allow himself to be helped.
He who passes his days lamenting
about his own misfortune or the incessant rain dies.
Slowly dies he who abandons a project
before beginning it,
he who doesn’t ask questions about topics he doesn’t know,
he who doesn’t answer when he is asked something that he knows.
Let’s avoid death by small doses,
remembering always that being alive requires a much larger effort
than the simple act of breathing.
Only burning patience will bring within reach a splendid happiness.”
memyselfandela 